Monthly Archives: August 2012

When my ex calls me

Mjolnir: When my ex calls me and all he wants to talk about is his new girlfriend.

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Rise and Rise Again.

I am not a happy person. I am a diabetic, an athlete, and I have major depressive disorder.  On more days than not I wake up and groan not because of aches and pains but because I have to keep fighting to care about myself, about my job, about school, about my life in general. That is not easy to do. I do not really understand where some of the feelings come from and I think if I could pin it down, or if others could, it wouldn’t be such a problem in the world but it creates a sensation of futility.  There is a hopelessness to every day that pervades even the simplest thoughts and undermines efforts to interact with even my closest friends.  These are people who I have known my entire life and should be able to at least talk but instead I undermine my confidence in them. I doubt their loyalty, their trustworthiness, and especially their willingness to cause me further pain.  While I have dealt with this for an extended period of time there was a particular string of events that occurred almost a year ago that took me to the brink and in some ways past it.

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